The Open University’s A174 Start Writing Fiction course is a short 12 week course that I completed in July this year.  It’s an online course, with a tutor and tutor group, three online tutorials (where your tutor sets exercises separate to those in the coursework) and two eTMAs (Electronic Tutor Marked Assignments).

I wasn’t going to post any work on this blog, being far too self-conscious and self-critical (i.e. I think my work is crap) but I’ve decided to be brave.  So here is Part 1 of eTMA 01, unedited.

The brief

In 500 words, write a complete mini-story where the central character is a child.  Write it from the child’s point of view (using ‘I’), and in the past tense.  Pay attention to the kind of language a child might use; and to the observations particular to a child.  Use as your setting: a busy city street, where something has just happened, before the story actually begins.  Use some dialogue.

The Doll

We had been outside the toy shop when my mum stopped to talk to our fat neighbour with the ginger cat who digs up our garden. I’d gone into the shop to get a closer look at the doll with the lovely long blond hair in the window.

There was a bang, glass smashed, then I was standing on the pavement.  I could smell burning but not like the smell of burnt toast when my mum’s making breakfast.  People ran out of the shopping centre screaming and shouting.  The sound of distant sirens got closer as police cars and ambulances came screeching round the corner and pulled up outside.  I looked around for my mum but couldn’t see her.  I started to panic, worried that I’d get told off for wandering off by myself.  “Mummy!”  I shouted.  “Mummy, where are you?”  I bit my trembling lower lip, trying not to cry.  Something warm ran down my face, I wiped it with the back of my hand which came back red.  “My head‘s bleeding! MUMMY!” Hot tears streamed down my face and a man wearing a uniform came over and asked if I was ok.

“I’ve lost my mum, she’s going to tell me off for wandering off and my head’s bleeding,“ I spluttered in between sniffs and gulps.

“Don’t worry, we’re going to look after you,” he said as he took my hand and led me off to an ambulance.  As we walked across the street, I trod on something and looked down.  It was the doll’s head from the shop.  I bent down and picked it up and held on to it getting some comfort from the cool plastic while the ambulance man gently dabbed my head with ointment.

“Now then Miss, what’s your name?” he asked me.

“Amy, um, Amelia.  I mean my mum calls me Amelia but my friends call me Amy,” I tell him.

“Well then Amy Amelia, where did you last see your mum?” he asked as he put a bandage on my head.

“She was talking to our fat neighbour with the ginger cat who digs up our garden.”

“And were you next to her the whole time?” he looked at me and I didn’t know if he was going to tell me off or not but he seemed kind so I told him the truth.

“No, I went into the toy shop to look at a doll”.

He loosened my grip on the doll’s head.  “This doll?”

I nodded. “I was hoping my mum would buy it for me.”

“Like the one that lady over there’s holding?”

I followed his gaze.  “Mummy!” I jumped up and ran over to her unable to contain my relief.  “I’m sorry Mummy, I didn’t mean to go off on my own,” I wrapped my arms around her neck as she leant down to inspect the bandage on my head.

“I’m just glad you’re safe.  I bought you this doll while you weren’t looking, come on, let’s go home,” she said as she handed me the doll and gripped my hand, never to let go again.